drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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