LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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