Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
