the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Dicks are not precious.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
