ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize