we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
