is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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