she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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