She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
