i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
