her vagine was all disorganized.
I just cut my nipple shaving
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
