Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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