haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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