She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
