So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
