hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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