Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Randomize
