return my video game
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
