YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize