I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
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