I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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