So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
she peed on how many people?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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