I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
