Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
