I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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