so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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