i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
