He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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