i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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