I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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