I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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