Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Farmville is her only friend.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
