Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
so explain again why im purple
no
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
