I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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