Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
