Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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