After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
