i already hear my dad disowning me
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i dont even know how to be here
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
