it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
