I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
