Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Randomize
