trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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