I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
so let's talk penis.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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