His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
