I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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