i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
