no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Who died my cat blue again?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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