Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
its liver damage thursday
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