You made me cry and you don't even care
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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