My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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